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URGENT: Help Janeane Garofalo revive her career!
Thinking about what I wrote earlier today, I realized that it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness. Sure, Janeane Garofalo was one of the voices for the latest Pixar animation disaster Ratatouille (whether she played a 'Rat isn't known), but other than that after leaving Air America she's pretty much disappeared from public consciousness.
My solution to her career woes: buy the following, and wear it. Trust me on this: I am not the only person with the desire to see her wear something like this. The fact that things like this are for sale indicate the depth of the thinking on this issue.
Posted in Janeane at 11:54 PM
Randi Rhodes: scatological, drunk, and horny
Randi Rhodes, discussing her "style", says:
It's fact-based scatological rants. The stuff is in my head because I read everything in the morning. And of course, all weekend long I'm watching C-span. So I have the facts. But it's scatological. It just comes out...
Then, in response to the question, "If we were at a bar, would it be the same Randi Rhodes that I hear on the air?", we're treated with this:
Yeah, except drunk. Except drunk and really horny.
It's at times like this that I think back to the glory days, when Janeane Garofalo was cute. Sure, she tried to be trendy, rather than (just as an example) dressing in a more classic/traditional/preppy/Catholic schoolgirl way. But, at least she had a cute face. Then, she got dumpy - and not in the natural way but more in the Fran Liebowitz way - and when she went to a blonde wig I couldn't quite figure out exactly what sort of message she was sending. But, she still had somewhat of a cute face.
Hey... what happened to Randi? And, hey, wasn't Brian Maloney here too? Did they leave or something?
UPDATE: Janine truly is a woman of a thousand faces, many of them cute, some, well, not so cute.
Posted in RandiRhodes at 01:10 PM
Man of the people: Al Franken worth over $4.3 million
Al Franken is truly a man of the people, just as long as you define "people" as "those worth somewhere between $4.3 million and $9.9 million." Spokesman Andy Barr says it's more towards the low end. His salary last year - via his company Alan Franken Inc. - was just over $1 million.Meanwhile, his opponent, Senator Norm Coleman, can only come up with a $564,000 IRA rollover.
...Franken, a former "Saturday Night Live" writer and performer, lists assets including mutual funds, municipal bonds in New York and Minnesota, bank accounts and Alan Franken Inc. Most are owned jointly with his wife, Franni. Alan Franken Inc. is valued at between $500,000 and $1 million.
The report also lists a few dozen sources of compensation of at least $5,000, including "Saturday Night Live" residuals; film residuals for the movie "When a Man Loves a Woman," which Franken co-wrote with Ron Bass; and speaking engagements. Those fees were all paid to Al Franken Inc., Barr said.
Posted in StuartSmalley at 10:49 AM
Air America 2.0 relaunches May 21; "I'm an Air American!"
I thought Air America 2.0 had already been launched, but apparently history has been changed once again, and the official launch of the new and improved network will be on May 21, sources say. The owner's brother, Mark Green, says:
"The completely redesigned web site will give Air America listeners another platform to participate in the progressive movement through an interactive blog where they can read and give commentary on topical issues of the day."
As part of the redebut, Paul Newman will be featured in an ad campaign with the incredibly inventive tag line "I'm an Air American!"
But, wait, there's questionable campaigning as well, with Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama and John Edwards scheduled to be interviewed. Mayor Mike Bloomberg was interviewed today by Green, his former rival. Other "celebrities" stopping by include Robert Redford and Gloria Steinem.
New hosts include barely-famous celebrities Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Arianna Huffington and Bob Kerrey.
They've also named a "chief blogger", one Nancy Scola who currently can be found at nancyscola.com (Alexa traffic rank: 2,777,629). A quick search of her site reveals her to be a progressive, but, sad to say, not of the rabid Amanda Marcotte variety.
Posted in Meta at 01:24 PM
F.U. Al Franken Campaign News: beating Norm Coleman by a wide margin!
Welcome to today's issue of Fantasy Universe Al Franken News, where I present the news from the fantasy universe where there will be a Senator Al Franken. In today's edition:A new Minnesota Public Radio poll shows Republican Sen. Norm Coleman would handilyIt just depends on how you look at things.defeatbe defeated by DFLers Mike Ciresi or Al Franken if the election were held today. That may sound like good news for Coleman, but the election is a year and a half away and the poll also shows some troubling signs for the incumbent...
...Matched up again Franken, Coleman wouldwinlose 54 to 32 percent. Against Ciresi, he wouldwinlose 52 to 29 percent.
While Coleman is struggling with popularity, his negative ratings are wellbelowabove those of Al Franken. According to the poll, nearly 8 of 10 Minnesotans know who Franken is and, of them, nearly a third have anunfavorableextremely favorable opinion of him...
Posted in StuartSmalley at 06:13 PM
F.U. Al Franken Campaign News
It's not exactly clear to me whether Air America Radio is still on the air and in any case, unlike frequently in the past, they haven't made any news lately like by taking loans from Boys & Girls clubs or something. Likewise with Al Franken, who's still as far as I know attending bean feeds (sample) and praising those linked to CAIR and such like that, eh, sure, youbetcha.
So, as I watch this site's traffic plunge even lower than AAR's previous ratings, I know I have to do something.
Introducing F.U. Al Franken Campaign News! This new feature will combine the occasional reports from the campaign trail, with completely made up stories from the "Fantasy Universe (F.U.)" where Stuart Smalley is a valid contender for Senate.
From the real universe, Sen. Norm Coleman is actually doing something good, trying to advance legislation that would prevent cities from acting as sanctuaries for illegal aliens. The 9/11 Commission warned about that, and past terrorists have taken advantage of such policies. Meanwhile, over in FU, Franken has come out for an open border with Mexico.
In real life, Stuart got $248,450 from Hollywood figures (including Stephen Bing, someone linked to at least one very questionable person), and just $194,760 from Minnesotans.
Back in FU, Stuart made a splash earlier this week when he appeared on The View and endorsed Rosie O'Donnell's MIHOP/LIHOP theories, even going as far as blaming the Hapsburg dynasty and their links to the Illuminati, the Trilateral Commission, and those who are 43rd level members of the CFR.
Meanwhile in FU2 (the alternative Fantasy Universe), Al Franken has been promoted to second shift supervisor at the Wakalookouta, Minnesota WalMart.
Posted in StuartSmalley at 08:14 PM
"Young Turks" are profiled
Heath Harrison of the Herald-Dispatch - reporting from Huntington - profiles the Young Turks here. It seems they appeal to the young folks, unlike old fogeys like Tucker Carlson:
"I think Tucker Carlson grew up in 1912 or something... Where did they find a guy who's young and apparently did not grow up with the rest of us?"
So, so true. Of course, Cenk has been 29 for a while now, so he's able to relate to the youth. Harrison also gets a scoop:
...WCMI Assistant Program Director Brandon Millman said the show offers a youthful perspective on politics and was a proven success as Sirius Satellite Radio's first national liberal program...
Read the whole thing, even if you aren't in the Tri-State area.
Posted in AlsoRans at 11:32 AM
