Does globalist Al Franken really support a United Nations "army"?
In a questionnaire given by the far-left globalist group Global Solutions (peekURL.com/zw8dzql), Al Franken has revealed himself to be a scary internationalist who'd yield U.S. sovereignty to the United Nations. Not just that, but he's either ignorant or he's come out in support of giving the U.N. a standing army.
Franken was asked:
Will you cosponsor a resolution in Congress supporting the establishment of a U.N. Emergency Peace Service if one is introduced?
He replied:
I would support anything that helps shorten the time it takes for peacekeepers to be deployed.
Now, read this for the background on the UNEPS.
The UNEPS would be a standing force of basically mercenaries 15,000 strong that could be deployed anywhere within 48 hours under the direction of the U.N. Security Council. While that might make some sense in certain cases in certain lawless regions, it could be completely abused and might even result in U.N. troops - yes, U.N. troops - being deployed inside the U.S.
The United Nations is already trying to establish a global tax via proposals such as the Law of the Sea Treaty (LOST). Giving them a standing army would hasten the process towards world government.
I'll be contacting the Al Franken campaign to see whether he was ignorant of the UNEPS or whether he truly supports that plan.
24 HOURS LATER UPDATE: I asked the Franken campaign about this via their online form, someone from their campaign visited this page, and all I got out of it so far is being added to their mailing list. If they don't respond with a statement within another day I'll assume that Franken supports giving the UN a standing army.
36 HOURS LATER UPDATE: Another email later, I'm still waiting to hear back.
Norm Coleman campaign calls Al Franken sleazy, bad bowler
If there's one thing Minnesotans love more than cheese, it's bowling. So, Norm Coleman has hit their sweet spot with this following ad featuring three bowlers. Per this, the ad has them discussing:
"Foul-mouthed attacks ... tasteless, sexist jokes" and "writing all that juicy [you know what]." ..."And we've decided we're running for U.S. Senate," one guy says. "Why not? We're just as qualified as Al Franken, and we're better bowlers."
Al Franken accepts ACORN endorsement
The far-left group ACORN has endorsed Al Franken, and moreover he's accepted their endorsement. Obtaining a full list of indictments and scandals relating to ACORN is left as an exercise, but this might be a good starting point:
Implicated in numerous reports of fraudulent voter registration, vote-rigging, voter intimidation, and vote-for-pay scams during the 2004 election
The brother of their founder embezzled $1 million from the group, and their board decided to hush it up.
So, I guess Al Franken is just coming full circle.
Jesse Ventura out; Dean Barkley, Priscilla Lord Faris, Jack Uldrich in
Jesse Ventura won't be entering the race for Senator from Minnesota, but Al Franken has some new challengers: Dean Barkley and Jack Uldrich have filed to run from the Independence Party (formerly the Reform Party in that state), and Priscilla Lord Faris is challenging Franken in his own Democratic-Farmer-Labor-Socialist Party (the DFL). Barkley (link) is an affiliate of Ventura.
Norm Coleman beating Al Franken by 10 points
Playboygate appears to have had an impact on the chances of former alleged funnyman Al Franken, as a new Quinnipiac University poll shows Norm Coleman leading by 10 points. Meanwhile and as a control, Barack Obama is leading John McCain by 17 points. Further, Coleman is ahead by 20 points among independents.
According to Franken spokeshackette Jess McIntosh:
"We've seen all sorts of polls saying all sorts of things, and I'm sure that'll continue all the way through November... This is a close race and we're very excited about where we are."
At this point in time, Franken should consider making his run simply performance art, complete with a mockumentary documenting his attempt. He might as well make some money off the deal, since he's not going to be moving to DC.
Al Franken is Democratic Party nominee for Senator from Minnesota!
Congratulations, Al Franken! You're the new Democratic Party nominee for Senate from Minnesota and you're going to try to take on Norm Coleman! What are you going to do?
"I understand that the people of Minnesota deserve a senator who won't say things that make them feel uncomfortable."
That, of course, is a reference to his endless line of embarassing, offensive, and/or downright stupid comments recently and over the years.
At this point in time, I don't know what the GOP is going to do. Franken is a fierce competitor, and his ideas - and his style - truly resonates with Minnesotans.
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The Al Franken Implode -O- Rama
The NRSC gets all MTV with the quick edits in this anti-Al Franken video detailing some of his recent "issues". While I like the ad and the format is a bit unexpected considering the source, those in Minnesota might find it a bit too fast and jumpy. They like their commercials like their cheese: slow and easy.
Al Franken graphic Playboy sex story
Senatorial candidate Al Franken looks more and more like a candidate more suited for San Francisco than St. Paul, as he held a Monday fundraiser at the Chicago home of Christie Hefner, CEO of Playboy Magazine.
Not only that, but a very graphic January 2000 column he wrote for that magazine has come to light. There are excerpts at the link which I'm not going to print here lest visitors get the wrong idea about this site. The DFL Party is apparently running scared, since they've reportedly brought in a crisis management specialist to deal with the Franken campaign's impending meltdown.
5/29/08 UPDATE: As much as Stuart Smalley would like it to, it's not going away.
Fellow Democrat and former Mike Ciresi supporter Rep. Betty McCollum says of herself and other candidates:
"Do they spend all of their time defending him, or do they spend their time talking about issues that are important to this election? ...The whole story was a shocking surprise."
Others who are concerned are two other Democratic Representatives, Keith Ellison and Tim Walz. The former says he'll support Franken if he's nominated, but McCollum isn't so sure. Note that Al Franken had kind words for Ellison about a year ago.
But, wait, McCollum had more:
"I can tell you it's not playing comfortably in St. Paul, and I can't imagine this politically radioactive material is doing very well in suburban and rural districts."
If any Franken advisors are reading this site, I urge them to "think outside the box". Rather than rushing from this unfortunate graphic article, embrace it and try to help push the progressive/liberal agenda in Minnesota. Urge those backward, frozen hicks to lighten up and appreciate Franken's humor and his openness about sexual matters. Perhaps his fellow co-hosts Janeane Garofalo and Randi Rhodes could even be brought in to help show those near-Canucks the error of their backwoods ways and help them become better liberals instead of the regressive crypto-conservatives they are now.
Al Franken vs. Jesse Ventura!?
Speaking at the Mall of America - the cultural hub of Minnesota - Jesse Ventura hinted that he'll be running against both Al Franken and Norm Coleman for Senator from Minnesota:[He] told the crowd that "none of the above" would be a better choice than Norm Coleman or Al Franken.If he doesn't run, his former campaign manager Dean Barkley says he will.
"I may go down and file," he added. "I will be 'none of the above,' and if I win, I'll go to Washington."
Jack Nelson-Pallmeyer: the real heir to Paul Wellstone
From this:On the Senate campaign trail, Al Franken frequently invokes the name of his friend, the late Sen. Paul Wellstone, as a major inspiration.Clearly, if the Democrats want to win, they only have one logical choice: JNP '08!
But as Franken moves to consolidate Democrats behind his challenge to Republican Sen. Norm Coleman, another Democrat is chipping into his support — one whose background and beliefs spark even greater Wellstone nostalgia for some voters...
...A professor of Justice and Peace Studies at the University of St. Thomas in St. Paul, Nelson-Pallmeyer's campaign platform is fueled by his lifelong focus on social justice and economic equality. He often leans on his life experience, from teaching in inner city Chicago to living in Central America to leading large Iraq war protests...
...Nelson-Pallmeyer is to Franken's left on just about everything. He's opposed to the death penalty in all circumstances, for nationwide legalization of same-sex marriages, a full withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq in the next nine months, universal single-payer health insurance and a massive reduction in defense spending...
Over half of Minnesotans: Franken should drop out!
Bad news for Al Franken: throwing his accountant under the bus didn't work. And, 51% of Minnesotans think he should drop out of the race for Senator of that state. 59% said his failure - oops, his accountant's failure - to pay the full amount of state income taxes in seventeen states will make them less likely to vote for the former alleged funnyman. Only 39% said it would make them more likely to vote for him or wouldn't make a difference at all.Now, for the spin:
Andy Barr, Franken's campaign spokesman, dismissed the poll results, calling the poll "deeply troubling from a spin standpoint, but from a social studies standpoint, as well."
Barr called the wording of the initial poll question "deeply flawed" because it doesn't mention the fact that Franken overpaid his taxes in Minnesota and New York, his official states of residence.
"It tells one side of the story when there are two equally important sides," Barr said. "Once you ask a question that's so slanted that it amounts to a push poll, it makes the other subsequent questions worthless."
Al Franken pays back taxes, economy rebounds
Former comedian and Air America Radio host and current Senate candidate Al Franken has paid $70,000 in back taxes that he owed to seventeen - count 'em, 17 - states across the U.S. It was all his accountant's doing! Of course, that accountant had been doing his taxes for 18 years and he couldn't be reached for comment... because he was under a bus, or something. Per Stuart, he paid more in NY and MN and less in other states due to "his accountant"
"Franni and I have paid state and federal taxes on every cent of our income... Franni and I believe in paying state and federal taxes on all our income."
And, I'm sure he does and this was just an "accounting error".
Poll: Al Franken only behind Norm Coleman by 7 points!
Good news for Al Franken: he's not sinking as fast as he could have or being trounced as much as he will be. A new Rasmussen telephone poll has Franken behind Senator Norm Coleman by only seven points. The margin of error is 4.5 points, but the same poll had Franken behind by just two points last month. And, in February, Franken was ahead of Coleman.
Norm Coleman raises $2 million in Q1, has $7 million in cash (+Jesse Ventura)
Sorry, Stuart! Minnesota's current and future Senator Norm Coleman raised $2 million in the first quarter and has $7 million in cash on hand. Al Franken raised $1.9 million in the last quarter of 2007, and hasn't yet released what he raised in Q1. And, he's only got $3.1 million in cash.
In related news, Jesse Ventura is threatening to enter the race, saying:
"You've got Norm Coleman who's a chicken hawk -- he wouldn't serve in Vietnam, he protested against it, now he's rubber stamped George Bush every vote he wanted for the war in Iraq. Then you've got Al Franken a carpet bagger, he hasn't lived in Minnesota for 30 years he doesn't even have a Minnesota driver's license."
And, in yet more related news, if anyone would like to show just how much of a hack Franken is, ask him tough questions about his immigration position (alfranken.com/pages/immigration) and then upload his stuttering response to Youtube. I strongly suspect that he knows little about the issue, since what's at that page is stock DNC boilerplate. I follow the issue closely and can come up with some questions that would throw him for a loop, so if anyone's in the area and is willing to ask him questions, leave a comment.
Bemidji PD: Al Franken now "person of interest"
As previously discussed, the Police Departement of Bemidji, Minnesota is attempting to speak with former Air America host and Senate candidate Al Franken in regards to a string of liquor store robberies that have occurred in that community over the last two months. They've now upgraded his status to a "person of interest", and have enlisted the aid of state police. A security cordon has been established around his compound, but officials are still uncertain on whether he's inside or whether he's fled to Canada or another country. Updates as they become available...
IMPORTANT UPDATE: Before I get a TRO from Al Franken's people or something, I want to make it clear that this was an "April Fool's Day Joke". In retrospect, I should have made it more obvious, and I apologize to Mr. Franken, his family, his friends, and the entire population of not just Bemidji but the state of Minnesota.
BTN AF82: Norm Coleman / Al Franken ad "Independent"
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The International Union of Operating Engineers, Local 49, said it wants the ad pulled immediately. One of the union's members was killed when the bridge collapsed. Twelve other people also died.
Local 49's political director Adam Duininck said it's wrong to use the tragedy in a campaign ad.
"It doesn't sit real well with us because of how personal I think it is for some of our members, and some of the people that were working on that bridge," Duininck said. "It was really a tragic event for a lot of us, and we just don't like to see it used as an issue ad -- used for political purposes."
The union has endorsed DFLer Al Franken's campaign against Coleman.
Coleman's campaign said it will not demand that American Future Fund pull its ad.
Mike Ciresi exits, Norm Coleman will beat Al Franken
Mike Ciresi has left the DFL nomination process for Senator from Minnesota, leaving only Al Franken and Jack Nelson-Pallmeyer seeking the DFL nomination. From his announcement yesterday:
I am announcing today my withdrawal from the contest for the DFL endorsement and the conclusion of my candidacy for the U.S. Senate. In my judgment, continuing the endorsement race would only lead to an unnecessary floor fight. It is time to step aside... We encourage all to remain committed to changing the direction of our nation and to support candidates of their choice.
No one's heard of JNP, in effect leaving only Stuart Smalley. This is actually good news for Minnesota, because Norm Coleman is going to have a much easier time running against him than Ciresi, someone who had lower negatives.
There is, however, one way that Al Fraken could win: bring in a team of former Soviet Union archivists who'll work night and day to remove all of the questionable things Franken has said and done over the past few decades from the public record. Airbrushes to the ready!
BTN 48-AF: "Dirt on Al Franken". TLs, SLs note
This is BTN 48-AF for TLs and SLs in Region 7. AP: 92-AF-MN-GO. Operation Harshwords.Unfortunately for Franken, I don't think most Minnesotans are going to respond well to his unprecedented history of extreme and mean-spirited name calling. In his many writings and media appearances, Franken has called Republicans every name in the book, including "shameless [expletive deleted]," "right-wing mother[expletive deleted]" and "[expletive deleted] morons." Franken has also referred to former Secretary of State James Baker as a "lying scumbag" and mocked World War II veteran Bob Dole over his war wounds by likening him to the one-armed murderer in the movie, "The Fugitive." In addition, Franken has expressed "hate" for President Bush and joked about executing members of his administration...Note also college student mocking, veteran mocking.
...Even Democrats have taken note of Franken's penchant for slash and burn politics, negative personal attacks and tendency to go too far with his strident rhetoric. DFL State Sen. Tom Bakk has called Franken "too negative." Democrat U.S. Senate candidate Mike Ciresi has noted that, "Al Franken has made a living calling people names."
Former Democratic State Senate Leader Allan Spear has said, "I just think there are a lot of things Al Franken has said over the years that are going to sound harsh and they're going to sound in some cases outrageous."
Spear is right on that score. While Franken's well-heeled supporters in Hollywood and Manhattan embrace his scorched earth attacks on Republicans as "human filth" and "nutcases," I am confident most Minnesotans will reject such name calling....
Al Franken Identity Politics Reply Form.doc
Al Franken has answered the Minnesota Stonewall DFL Questionaire (link) including with the news that several members of his staff "identify" as LGBT. That's important: he probably suspects that some haven't got around to "identifying" themselves as such, but he's hesitant to press the issue since that's only used against Republicans.
I note also that the reply has a certain form letter quality to it, so herewith I suggest a nifty copy-n-paste block he can use for future questionnaires:
First, as we will for every community, we'll devote time, energy, and resources to reaching out to the [INSERT COMMUNITY NAME HERE] by holding and attending events in the community, being visible in our support for the community, and standing with the community when it counts. That means voter registration events, [INSERT COMMUNITY NAME HERE]-specific literature, and issue-focused discussions – all geared towards energizing the community and building lasting relationships.
Al Franken mocks college student (Minnesota mean)
It's not as bad as the time when Al Franken mocked a legless Vietnam veteran, but the latest incident of Stuart Smalley going off the rails came earlier this month at Carleton College in Minnesota. It seems that Peter Fritz - a senior studying history - didn't want to be in a group photo with the Senate candidate. Someone shouted out that Fritz was... a conservative, sending Al Franken into yet another unhinged tirade:...Franken reportedly began peppering Fritz with questions about supporting President George W. Bush and former President Ronald Reagan's tax hikes. Fritz told me he got tense and, as he does in those situations, started chewing the inside of his mouth, a gesture he said was mimicked by Franken; Fritz also thought his style of speech was mocked by Franken.And, Fritz' account of the events was backed up by the president of the Carleton Dems. Al Franken truly has no class.
An aide eventually interrupted Franken's act, Fritz said, by announcing to the candidate that it was time to go.
Fritz told me Monday that he then stuck out his hand to shake Franken's. "Well, at least it's nice to meet you," the GOPer said he told Franken, who reportedly replied, I can't say the same.
There was no handshake, said Fritz.
Mike Ciresi TV ad: only he can beat Norm Coleman
Progressives who want to beat Norm Coleman only have one choice: Mike Ciresi. The polls show that Al Franken's negatives are too high, while Ciresi's are not.
Accordingly, to help you Minnesotans make the right choice, here's a new TV commercial from Mike Ciresi (big time Hollywood, California star Al Franken is still working on his ads):
Meanwhile, sure loser Al Franken has a "very special announcement" here. He says they raised almost $7 million from almost 80,000 people. What he doesn't disclose is the distribution; I'd imagine that a disproportionate share comes from a small number of Hollywood and liberal insiders.
In other news, Al Franken's twin brother has flicked his own TV commercial for his brother, live from Central America: link.
UPDATE: I cherish all visitors, especially commenters, and especially those of a "liberal" bent. In fact, I'll bet that people and hosts from Air America have even visited this site in the past and they're, of course, very welcome to leave comments. As for the comment from "1", the reason why illegal immigration continued despite the Republicans controlling the presidency and Congress is because only some Republicans support our laws. The Republican leadership, such as Bush, McCain, Lindsey Graham, etc. are aligned with the Democrats in supporting illegal immigration. Only a few GOP Senators and dozens of GOP House members oppose illegal immigration, and they fought against the schemes from Bush and the Democrats.
Paul Farhi / WaPo: Al Franken not a running joke
Paul Farhi of the Washington Post offers "No Running Jokes Here/With His Eye on a Senate Seat, Comedian Al Franken Says It's Time to Get Serious". Despite having four screens to work with, it is completely devoid of any content. It simply points out that he's toned down his "jokes" in order to appear normal. It briefly mentions Franken's contradictory positions on Iraq, but other than that doesn't question him on his policies.
Al Franken: double-talk on Iraq
The following campaign ad from Senator Norm Coleman takes Al Franken to task for his various conflicting comments regarding Iraq. He says he never supported or opposed Iraq, but he did. In 2006, he said he didn't support a "timetable" for withdrawal; this year he supported a "timeline". In 2006 he was against cutting off funding, in 2007 he was for it.
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Al Franken in pocket of civil servants union (AFSCME)
Al Franken has received the endorsement of Council 5 of the American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees (AFSCME), a union which profits from a bloated bureaucracy. Says their president:
"Workers nationwide have been ravaged by the Bush–Coleman agenda; our union will work tirelessly with candidate Franken to put an end to that."
Indeed.
In other news, Al Franken is weak on sugarbeets - that industry pumps 2 billion into Minnesota's economy, just between cows and ice - while Norm Coleman is strong.
Polls: Al Franken can't beat Norm Coleman, only Mike Ciresi can
Two new polls show that Minnesota Senator Norm Coleman is vulnerable... just not to Al Franken. Rather, Democrats in that state would be wise to throw their support to Mike Ciresi, clearly the only candidate who's a serious challenger to Coleman.
Rasmussen Reports says that Coleman leads 49% to 42% in a head-to-head match-up; by contrast that's 46% to 43% when matched with Ciresi.
Survey USA says it's 46%/45% for Coleman/Franken, but with Ciresi it's at 44% tie.
Clearly, if the Democrats want to beat Coleman, they'd be wise to back Ciresi and not the former comedian.
Forbes: Al Franken is #4 pundit in America
For those of you not on the "bleeding edge", September 24 is the new, hipper April 1. It's the day when the mainstream media prints obvious jokes that, on any other day, would cause their readers to question not just their journalistic integrity but their sanity as well.
To kick off this new "holiday", Forbes Magazine has printed the list of their "Top Ten Pundits". As part of the joke, they were selected not for their influence, but for their popularity. And, as a clear indicator that Forbes is not serious, look who made the list:
1. Roger Ebert
2. Bill Maher
3. Bill O'Reilly
4. Al Franken
5. Geraldo Rivera
6. Rosie O'Donnell
7. Leonard Maltin
8. Greta Van Sustern
9. Lou Dobbs
10. Bill Walton
Two braindead movie reviewers and a far-left NBA announcer? Wasn't Bob Costas available?
And, needless to say, the presence of Stuart Smalley - and the absence of people like Rush Limbaugh - further discredits the list. According to them, the soon-to-fail Senate candidate has "Appeal points" of 64 out of 100, and a 47% "Awareness level". (Presumably refering to others' awareness of him, and not his awareness of what's going on in the world.)
Thankfully, yesterday was the New April First.
Gasified biomass. Al Franken. Norman Hsu
One of those things is not like the others. Al Franken shares his thoughts:...Minnesota is a very windy state. We're ninth in the nation. We should really be exploiting that more...What I want to know is exactly how an obscure interview by an obscure interviewer with an obscure failed comedian got 364 Diggs; I note that the cross-post at her blog got only 2 Diggs. Odd. Very, very odd.
[...additional thoughts...]
...Right now gasified biomass is being used as fuel in ethanol plants...
In other Stuart Smalley news, he's returning a $2,300 donation. No, it wasn't from a Boys & Girls Club; that's a bit too hot right now. It was a donation from possibly imminent Arkancide victim Norman Hsu.
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Norm Coleman leads Al Franken in Minnesota poll
No big surprise there: Norm Coleman has always been ahead of Al Franken (Rasmussen poll of Minnesota voters). While support for Stuart Smalley has picked up five points from March, there are warning signs for Al: his DFL competitor Mike Ciresi's numbers are more favorable in some ways.
Franken is viewed favorably by 46%, up from 39%. However, he's viewed unfavorably by 47%, with 31% marking that as very unfavorably.
Ciresi, by contrast, is viewed unfavorably by 43%, with only 17% of that being in the very unfavorably category.
And, what's dragging Coleman down appears not to be him so much but president Bush.
Franken's numbers are only bound to get worse as more facts about his past come to light and as MN voters get a closer look at "Senator Al".
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Al Franken and disgraced Democrat fundraiser Norman Hsu
What did Al Franken know, and when did he know it? The Republican Party of Minnesota demands answers about Franken's links to the disgraced Democrat fundraiser Norman Hsu - a "Hillraiser" for Hillary Clinton:1. Did well-known bundler Norman Hsu bundle donations for Al Franken's U.S. Senate campaign?This is a perfect chance for some citizen journalism: please go to Al Franken's campaign appearances and ask him one or more of those questions. Then, upload his response to Youtube and let us know about it.
2. Did Al Franken or his campaign have any contacts with Norman Hsu?
3. Was Al Franken or his campaign aware of Norman Hsu's criminal past before the Franken campaign accepted his money?
Al Franken pledges to "take a look" at 9/11 Truther video
9/11 Truthers recently confronted Al Franken with evidence that 9/11 was an inside job. On the following video, the senatorial candidate claims he doesn't believe in such conspiracies and he doesn't support an investigation into what really happened. However, that's all for show. Al knows what really happened. He just doesn't want to admit that on tape. In fact, he's waiting until he gets into office, then you'll see what I like to refer to as "Super Al": an investigating, take-no-prisoners madman who'll get to the bottom of the issue.
Al Franken spins his and Coleman's donations
The following video is from the Al Franken campaign and features the candidate spinning his campaign contributions in the best way possible; notably he doesn't mention all the Hollywood money he's received. This is also here in case you want a vivid reminder of just how boring he was when he was on Air America Radio. If you're viewing this in your car, please pull over to a rest area first:
I note also that Stuart Smalley's web minions didn't approve the following comment I left; having an open debate is scary when you have no argument.
Franken doesn't have the guts to even mention what Bush was actually doing before the Coleman fundraiser. Bush was in Canada attending the SPP summit, something that someone like Franken probably supports.
Frankly Franken: The Real Al Franken
#18 told me I can finally reveal this site about Al Franken (props to 45's team: 632, 849, and 1011). It features a video of Al Franken saying we can't afford to lose in Iraq from a few years ago, followed by another clip of him supporting cutting funding for the troops.
It also has this quote from the alleged comic about whether he's going to move back to Minnesota:
"I visit family a lot, but no, I think I'm in New York pretty much permanently. My life is here, my kids grew up as New Yorkers."
Good work, guys and gals at HQ and the MN chapter!
Al Franken: just 18% of donations from Minnesota
In the second quarter, alleged comic and senatorial candidate Al Franken raised more money than the incumbent Norm Coleman. However, only 18% of the amount came from Minnesota, meaning that 82% of Al Frankens 2Q donations came from out of state. In contrast, Coleman was evenly split. In number of in-state contributions, Franken got 4000 to Coleman's 3500.
Where, o where could that 82% have come from? Walla Walla? Cucamonga? Alpine, TX? Ashtabula? Somehow I think the Westside of Los Angeles and Manhattan are better choices, but of course there's always Westchester County and other enclaves of "liberalism" to consider.
"Al Franken smacks detractor at Moorhead rally"
The title of this post is what I wish had happened. Instead, it was just a boring campaign stop, followed by this boring coverage/transcription of the event. Note also that Franken was in south Moorhead. He doesn't have the guts to show his ugly mug in the north side of town:
Al Franken spent 15 years making millions of people laugh each week while he starred on NBC's "Saturday Night Live" in the 1980s and 1990s.On a serious note:
He did the same Tuesday night in Moorhead for more than 100 people while campaigning for a U.S. Senate seat from Minnesota in 2008...
Student loan debt is one area Franken plans to address as a senator.If you asked him (something the "reporter" did not), Franken would probably support the DREAM Act, an anti-American bill that lets illegal aliens take discounted college educations from U.S. citizens. So, with one hand he'd be giving, and with the other he'd be taking away.
Federal Pell grants that once covered 90 percent of college tuition now cover only 40 percent, he said. "When I get to the Senate, I'm going to change that."
Al Franken ad misleads about Norm Coleman Iraq stance
There's a picture here of a full-page ad Al Franken (aka Stuart Smalley) will be running in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune. It features a picture of president Bush together with Minnesota Senator - and Franken opponent - Norm Coleman with this quote from the latter:"We are going to be in Iraq a long time."From that you might assume that Coleman supports the present strategy for an indefinite period. His actual stance appears to be a bit more nuanced, and it's certainly more realistic than the Smalley strategy of beginning a withdrawal immediately.
"We are going to be in Iraq a long time. I am not supporting dates, specific dates, timetables for withdrawal," [Coleman] said. "When my colleagues on the other side of the aisle talk about redeployment, they are talking about getting out of Iraq. I'm not. And simply because that's the reality."
Those who say U.S. troops must be out of Iraq by September are "missing reality," he said...
"Time will prove me right. I'm up for election in '08. If I'm wrong, folks, they'll have a chance to articulate that but I'm fairly confident, as I kind of look at the lay of the land, that we will have a change of mission, we will have significant drawdown but we're doing it without telling the enemy this is when we are getting out of here, without cutting off any funds, any support for the troops," Coleman said...
Shock: Al Franken beats Norm Coleman in donations
Alleged funnyman and former Air America Radio host Al Franken (aka Stuart Smalley) has raised $1.9 million in the second quarter of this year for his Senate bid from Minnesota. That beats the $1.6 million raised by his opponent the incumbent Norm Coleman. Franken's fellow Dem/DFRer Mike Ciresi raised $750,000.
Even more shocking:
According to Franken's campaign, more than 95 percent of his contributions in the last reporting period were $100 or less. The campaign said it raised only $5,500 from political action committees... Franken's emphasis on money raised from small donors could be a way to deflect criticism of "Hollywood" money, which he has tapped from friends and colleagues from the entertainment industry. In the first quarter of the year, scores of actors, writers, producers and others from that field contributed to Franken's campaign...
Of course, the positive sign (for America) is that Coleman has more cash on hand.
Al Franken: daily affirmations
Because I care about former Air America Radio hosts whose careers have since gotten even worse, I've decided to help Al Franken out with the following set of daily affirmations. While - of course! - Franken is the extremely talented creator of Stuart Smalley and thus is able to come up with his own helpful sayings, sometimes these things are best provided by those with a more objective perspective.
So - just to help him out in his Senate bid - I offer the following helpful list of things he can say to himself each day:
-----------------------
I admire my daughter for having the guts to discuss her bathroom habits not just in public but at the Huffington Post. Would that every politician's daughter were so forthright!
My earlier work with Saturday Night Live was, objectively speaking, very funny. I'm very proud of it and I have nothing to be ashamed of!
Bernie Sanders is the very epitome of an independent politician.
I love the people of Minnesota!
Minnesota Nice is quite alright with me! I don't for a moment miss the hustle-and-bustle of the big city.
My new life in Minnesota is much more laid-back, and it lets me concentrate on the things that are really important, like all those bean feeds and pot luck suppers and such like that, dontcha know.
It's great to see Randi Rhodes hanging on at Air America Radio and leading the fight for true progressivism. I wish her the best!
I love bean feeds!
I'm proud of the work I did for Air America Radio, and I was worth every penny that they paid me.
If I had to spend the next twenty years attending bean feeds and meeting the people of Minnesota, I'd do it!
I'm not ashamed of having lied about knowing about the loan that Air America's former-former owners took from a Boys and Girls Club, because I didn't lie! I didn't know about that loan because even though I signed a legal agreement saying that I had read the entire agreement I obviously skipped over the part discussing the loan. I skipped over that part. I didn't read it. I didn't know about it. It's OK!
I need to win this one! George Soros, Barbra Streisand, Ed Asner, and Sting are counting on me! Let's win this for the team!
I've had to "get physical" in a few cases to defend liberalism, and I'd do it again. Our communal philosophy is worth defending, even if I need to throw a few chairs to do it!
Despite what the enemy says, I wrote all those books myself. Those Harvard students were just research assistants, I'm the one who did the actual writing. I'm a good writer.
People enjoy my comedy and my wit.
-----------------------
Man of the people: Al Franken worth over $4.3 million
Al Franken is truly a man of the people, just as long as you define "people" as "those worth somewhere between $4.3 million and $9.9 million." Spokesman Andy Barr says it's more towards the low end. His salary last year - via his company Alan Franken Inc. - was just over $1 million.Meanwhile, his opponent, Senator Norm Coleman, can only come up with a $564,000 IRA rollover.
...Franken, a former "Saturday Night Live" writer and performer, lists assets including mutual funds, municipal bonds in New York and Minnesota, bank accounts and Alan Franken Inc. Most are owned jointly with his wife, Franni. Alan Franken Inc. is valued at between $500,000 and $1 million.
The report also lists a few dozen sources of compensation of at least $5,000, including "Saturday Night Live" residuals; film residuals for the movie "When a Man Loves a Woman," which Franken co-wrote with Ron Bass; and speaking engagements. Those fees were all paid to Al Franken Inc., Barr said.
F.U. Al Franken Campaign News: beating Norm Coleman by a wide margin!
Welcome to today's issue of Fantasy Universe Al Franken News, where I present the news from the fantasy universe where there will be a Senator Al Franken. In today's edition:A new Minnesota Public Radio poll shows Republican Sen. Norm Coleman would handilyIt just depends on how you look at things.defeatbe defeated by DFLers Mike Ciresi or Al Franken if the election were held today. That may sound like good news for Coleman, but the election is a year and a half away and the poll also shows some troubling signs for the incumbent...
...Matched up again Franken, Coleman wouldwinlose 54 to 32 percent. Against Ciresi, he wouldwinlose 52 to 29 percent.
While Coleman is struggling with popularity, his negative ratings are wellbelowabove those of Al Franken. According to the poll, nearly 8 of 10 Minnesotans know who Franken is and, of them, nearly a third have anunfavorableextremely favorable opinion of him...
F.U. Al Franken Campaign News
It's not exactly clear to me whether Air America Radio is still on the air and in any case, unlike frequently in the past, they haven't made any news lately like by taking loans from Boys & Girls clubs or something. Likewise with Al Franken, who's still as far as I know attending bean feeds (sample) and praising those linked to CAIR and such like that, eh, sure, youbetcha.
So, as I watch this site's traffic plunge even lower than AAR's previous ratings, I know I have to do something.
Introducing F.U. Al Franken Campaign News! This new feature will combine the occasional reports from the campaign trail, with completely made up stories from the "Fantasy Universe (F.U.)" where Stuart Smalley is a valid contender for Senate.
From the real universe, Sen. Norm Coleman is actually doing something good, trying to advance legislation that would prevent cities from acting as sanctuaries for illegal aliens. The 9/11 Commission warned about that, and past terrorists have taken advantage of such policies. Meanwhile, over in FU, Franken has come out for an open border with Mexico.
In real life, Stuart got $248,450 from Hollywood figures (including Stephen Bing, someone linked to at least one very questionable person), and just $194,760 from Minnesotans.
Back in FU, Stuart made a splash earlier this week when he appeared on The View and endorsed Rosie O'Donnell's MIHOP/LIHOP theories, even going as far as blaming the Hapsburg dynasty and their links to the Illuminati, the Trilateral Commission, and those who are 43rd level members of the CFR.
Meanwhile in FU2 (the alternative Fantasy Universe), Al Franken has been promoted to second shift supervisor at the Wakalookouta, Minnesota WalMart.
Al Franken CAIRs for Keith Ellison
On the 23rd, "Senator" Al Franken introduced Rep. Keith Ellison at a meeting of the "Progressive States Network". Ellison is the first Muslim in Congress, and he's linked to the highly questionable group CAIR.
On the following video, Smalley does a really, really bad Dick Cheney impersonation, makes a few "jokes", says he's "proud" that Ellison is his Congressman, makes an anti-Virgil Goode "joke" mocking his concerns, and.... zzzzzzzzzzzz..... oops, I appear to have nodded off for a second.
Al Franken "like[s] Minnesotans" (and Big Hollywood Money)
Al Franken isn't simply a Hollywood/New York carpetbagging blow-in who wants to spend his time in Washington rather than back home with the cheese-eating, bean-feeding yokels in Minnesota. No sirree! From this:"I like Minnesotans - always have," said Franken, who was born in New York City but grew up in the Minneapolis suburb of St. Louis Park. "They are earnest, decent people who have fun. They seem to get me - they understand what a joke is. That's why I'm not so worried about what the Republicans are trying to do" - a reference to GOP efforts to use some of his off-color remarks against him.How homespun! Of course, since those yokels aren't exactly lining up to open their wallets, he's got to get money from somewhere:
Franken told [the audience at a fundraiser in Los Angeles] that while Coleman takes money from "Big Tobacco" and "Big Oil," he'll be raising money from "Big Comedy" - and that he wouldn't be writing any congressional earmarks for [Tom Hanks].Laurie David is, of course, the Queen of Global Warming, often flying to appearances in a private jet. While he might not be beholden to Big Pharma, Franken will clearly owe some favors to Big Hollywood and Big Global Warming.
Hanks then walked out of the room and slammed the door, Franken recalled in an interview Wednesday. Returning to applause, the actor pointed to Franken and the two said in unison, "Big Comedy."
...The Los Angeles fundraiser, held at the home of "Seinfeld" co-creator Larry David and his wife Laurie, brought in about $200,000, and another fundraiser in San Francisco yielded about $90,000, Franken said. That helped him pull in $1.35 million in the first quarter of the year, despite not raising any money until he announced his candidacy Feb. 14. Coleman raised $1.53 million during the quarter.
Al Franken at Kandiyohi County DFL's "best bean feed fundraiser ever"
Sources report that Al Franken and other DFLers (the Minnesota version of the Party of Socialism and Liberation) spent Saturday at the Kandiyohi County DFL's "best bean feed fundraiser ever". For your protection, I'm going to translate the report into the local language:
An annual potluckah hosted by the Kandiyohi County DFLah turned into a banner event Saturday evening youbetcha after several of the state's big-wig democrats ayup made appearances to schmoozeah the locals and raisah money for the DFL party. Eh? Eh!
More than 150-ah locals watched Alah Frankenah, and they had their best take ever. But, he wasn't aloneah!
Willmar's State Rep Al Juhnke perused the room along with former state Senate Majority Leader Dean Johnson. Other well-known state DFLers such as Michael Ciresi and James Cohen were also present.
Ya-sure?
Before coming to Saturday's fundraiser, Franken participated in a candidate debate in Granite Falls and later had coffee with Johnson in Willmar... Although Franken said he didn't get a chance to mingle with too many locals during his coffee break, "talking to Dean is a good substitute," he said... "Rural Minnesota is a good place to be," [Michael Ciresi] said.
Youbetcha!
And for those who didn't get their fill, there was always 10-by 5-inch apple pie that Franni Franken - Al Franken's wife - baked for the auction held after the meal. A similar pie brought in $100 at a different auction, she said... Franni said the monster of a pie was only medium-sized. Careful not to reveal any of her culinary craft, when asked how to bake such a big pie she responded slyly, "you use a lot of apples."
IMPORTANT UPDATE: First, some have written to say that the DFL isn't linked to the Party of Socialism and Liberation; other have suggested I'm thinking of the Revolutionary Communist Party, a former Air America Radio advertiser. Also, a couple have written to say that Minnesota is actually a U.S. state and is not a part of Canada. Those are all interesting points, and keep the letters coming.
Al Franken to cleanse airwaves of Glenn Beck
Comrade Al Franken announced on a recent edition of Larry King Live that Imus won't be the last. In fact - just like the righteous Defenders of Truth And Freedom at Media Matters for America - Franken is targeting Glenn Beck for his noxious, racist, xenophobic, anti-human comments. Senator Al makes the correct distinction in this matter between Beck and satirists like Lenny Bruce. Bruce's satire had a point; Beck's does not and thus is indefensible.
My fellow comrades will forgive me for hearing the Franken quote on the odious Matt Drudge radio show; I was trying to tune in GramsciTalk on 620AM when I accidentally tuned in 640AM. I immediately turned the radio off when Franken's quote was over, and I will make a mental note not to listen to that station again. Sadly I was unable to turn on the recorder quickly enough because I was momentarily shocked after hear the horrible Drudge speaking, and I only recovered my senses after Franken began speaking. I shall endeavor to find a recording for The People.
Developing...
Al Franken to fete CAIR-linked Keith Ellison; Wonkette helps
David Sirota sends word that on April 19th, Al Franken will be emceeing a "gala" from the Progressive States Network which will fete Sen. Jon Tester (D-MT) (the "liberal"-with-a-crewcut guy) as well as Rep. Keith Ellison (D-MN).
Ellison is the first Muslim in Congress, and he's linked to the Council on American-Islamic Relations ("CAIR"), a supposedly mainstream group that certainly isn't (1,2,3,4).
Meanwhile, over in Time, Ana Marie Cox - the super-lightweight "reporter" who formerly wrote for the then-and-now sleaze site Wonkette - offers a paen to Stuart Smalley called "Don't Laugh at Al Franken"
[Mark Drake, spokesman for the Minnesota GOP] says [Franken's long line of "jokes"] get at a "larger truth" about Franken: he's got an anger issue. He once literally tackled a stubborn heckler at a Howard Dean rally after the security staff failed to eject the man. And at the 2003 White House correspondents' dinner, he greeted Karl Rove with the words "I hate you." (Franken has said they just "gibed each other a little.")
Not everything's going smoothly in the Smalley campaign:
Franken walks into a precinct meeting and has already begun his 60-second stump speech when the audience's slightly puzzled expressions prompt him to ask, "Have I interrupted the process?" A beat of silence. "That's O.K.," someone says. Slightly rattled, Franken ends quickly. I'm not sure if he hears it when someone calls, "Yeah, who are you?" Fortunately, someone else answers for him: "That was Al Franken."
Meanwhile, over in "Franken's satire might become issue":
"He is going to have a lot of explaining to do," said Republican activist Annette Meeks, "because some of the stuff he's said is so inflammatory and so personally hurtful. And it's not just the content -- yes, people know it's satire -- but it's the tone." ...For instance, Franken described Norm Coleman, the incumbent Republican, as "one of the administration's leading butt boys." That appears in Franken's 2005 book, "The Truth (with Jokes)." ...Franken has said he believes Coleman has been subservient to the Bush administration. But he says he'll replace the phrase with "lapdog."
Al Franken Campaign News
Just a few days ago, Drudge linked to this article discussing a campaign appearance by Al Franken, reminding me that I - like almost everyone else - had forgotten that he was running for Senator from Minnesota.
I will not repeat that same mistake more than a few times, and I promise wall-to-wall coverage of the former Air America Radio host.
Herewith, from the first link:
"I just had a meeting about all the background of alfalfa"
Note: he means the crop. Meanwhile, in news that mentions Stuart:
[Al Goldstein's candidacy [for President of the U.S.] follows a tradition that began in 1968 with the candidacy of black humorist Dick Gregory, and was continued, most recently, by former wrestler and TV announcer Jesse "The Body" Ventura, who served one term as Governor of Minnesota. [Pr0nographer] Larry Flynt and [pr0n] star Mary Carey, each posted a top twenty finish in California's 2003 free-for-all of a special Governor's election. Liberal actor, writer, and talk show host Al Franken is now running for the Minnesota senator's seat.
Perhaps Stuart will announce his support. Meanwhile:
Failed radio mouth and Senatorial candidate from Minnesota, Al Franken, told David Letterman on the set of the "Late Show" that the USA should reconsider approving the Kyoto Protocols because the treaty is good for the economy — Despite that the ruinous treaty was voted down by a unanimous Senate vote in 1997 for the very reason that it would harm the economy... ...[Stuart says:] "We need to do an Apollo project in renewable energy... We need to have biofuels, we need wind."
On the bright side:
DFL Senate candidate Al Franken announced Wednesday his campaign had raised more than $1.3 million in the first quarter of the year, finishing the period with over $1 million in the bank.
The question, of course, is whether that will continue. How much of that was from Hollywood "liberals" rather than grassroots support? Will they keep giving at the same rate?
Source: beneficent Jupiter to help Al Franken
I think I've located Al Franken's new campaign manager:
...[Al Franken]'s Sun is within 15 minutes of a conjunction to Mars in Gemini, and this strengthens the Gemini influence even more, giving him a strong drive (Mars) to communicate his opinions and ideas. The conjunction of Mars to the Sun often bestows a tremendous amount of physical energy and an aggressive or assertive personality that is not afraid to express one's own needs and desires. Over the past six years many of us that lean to the left have become very angry at what we view as the destruction of the political process and global good will that the Bush administration has created, and Al Franken is no exception. This has gained him the reputation on the right of being an angry person, but this is not shown in his chart. Aggressive, yes. Fearless in his self-expression, yes (both shown by the Mars/Sun combination). But not angry...
Coming soon: ridding Stuart Smalley of his BodyThetans.
Posted at 10:28 PM | Comments (1)
Al Franken's first fib (as a Senate candidate)
Al Franken has assuredly told many fibs in his career, but on Monday in Rochester, Minnesota he spoke to a "packed audience" and told them the first publicly-noted fib as a Senate candidate. Now, bear in mind that if Bill Clinton parsed what he said it would be technically accurate, but others will probably not see it that way:
He says he wanted to run for U.S. Senate earlier, but a radio show stopped him... "I didn't want to wait any longer, I was doing Air America, I was under contract. I honor my contracts and so this was the earliest I could do it."
The actual fact is that he's been in effect running for Senator for several months now, masquerading it as "considering" a run for Senate. He also formed a PAC and began doling out Hollywood money, most likely in the hope of receiving support in return. And, he's also been making statements about his presumed opponent, Sen. Norm Coleman.
Posted at 12:51 PM | Comments (0)
Al Franken wants a massive amnesty for illegal aliens
In an interview, Al Franken said that he's a supporter of "comprehensive immigration reform". That phrase is a euphemism used by Bush and the Democrats for a massive illegal alien amnesty combined with a "guest" worker program.
The Bush/Democrats scheme will flood the U.S. with new legal immigrants, particularly through chain migration: family members can invite in other family members, and the latter will invite in family members of their own, on and on and on. An original estimate was close to 100 million new Americans over the next twenty years; that estimate was since reduced to "only" about 65 million.
But, wait, that's not all: millions and millions of potential illegal aliens around the world will see the scheme that Franken supports for what it is: a massive amnesty. And, they'll come a-running.
Think illegal immigration is bad now? Wait until "reform".
Still not convinced? Look into Mexico's constant attempts to meddle in our internal politics, and the political power they have inside the U.S. Several well-known organizations - including the ACLU, SPLC, AFSC, MALDEF, SEIU and more - have indirect links to the Mexican government. Franken's massive amnesty would give that foreign government tremendous pull inside the U.S. and allow them to engage in hitherto unknown level of political influence.
Oh, did I add that all those that would be put on the "path to citizenship" that Franken supports would jump in the citizenship line ahead of those potential legal immigrants who've been waiting patiently in other countries for their chance to come to the U.S.? Yeah, it would screw them too.
Is it that Al can't figure that out, or that he doesn't care?
Posted at 08:43 PM | Comments (1)
Poll: Norm Coleman would beat Al Franken in landslide
KSTP - a known "house organ" for Minnesota Senator Norm Coleman - begins their anti-Al Franken coverage with "POLL: Coleman would easily trump Franken". According to them and Survey USA, the incumbent would get 57 percent vs. just 35 for the challenger. And, Franken's numbers are similar to those of Mike Ciresi, a possible DFL challenger. The poll's internals are gloated upon here.
Posted at 10:22 AM | Comments (0)
Al Franken's last day: live coverage
Following an extremely exciting Tom Oliphant segment, Al Franken is now upping the tempo (as if that were possible!), bringing on Joe Conason to pimp his new book, "It can happen here". Al knew that Sinclair Lewis was from Minnesota, but seemed a bit unclear on the meaning of the word "dystopian". Conason jumped in, defining it in terms even Franken could understand: "the opposite of utopian".
Is there a Tivo for radio? Even better, can't IBM or someone come up with a voice recognition thing that would create a live transcript? It's not that bad, it's just that there's an exciting show on the Paint Drying Channel that I'd rather be watching.
Alright! It's going to get even more exciting in the next episode, which will feature "Stormin' Norman" Ornstein. Boo yah!
Just leave already. He's dividing the exit into two segments. The first with the news that he's going, and the second with the news of what he's doing.
WHAT!?!?!? Al Franken is running for Senate? I never expected to hear him say that!
Here's a video tribute - une homage - to Franken:
(For some reason Youtube pulled the video I uploaded there.)
Posted at 10:37 AM | Comments (2)
Al Franken tearfully leaves radio, announces Senate run
In a tearful, emotion-filled program, actor, comedian, radio host, author, and now politician Al Franken announced on his show on Wednesday that he's leaving the air waves in order to run for Senate from Minnesota. He said this was a sad Valentine's Day, but his present to the nation was his running for office.
Wednesday's show may go down in history for its emotional depth, featuring as it did several close friends of Franken as well as associates from Air America. Progressive, liberal, and socialist politicians and pundits dropped by or listened in.
In a career of remarkable feats - who can ever forget Stuart Smalley and his "daily affirmations", or the transmission antenna bowl thing strapped to his helmet on that TV show he was on - this show will go down in history as among those.
Like Janus at the gates, I say, "Goodbye, Al Franken, mind the door. But, welcome too. We wish you well!"
11/4/2008 UPDATE: Franken fought a good effort, but it appears that, unfortunately, he just wasn't good enough. This site sends its congratulations to the new Senator from Minnesota, fellow comic Scott Thompson (Carrot Top, not the guy from Kids in the Hall).
Posted at 11:01 AM | Comments (1)
Celebrity Congress! Franken would bring humor, laughs, fun
College newspapers - such as the NYT, LAT, WaPo and the rest - infamously featured a string of articles in which they lionized Al Franken and also "reported" that he was considering running for Senate.
Now, the MSM is starting Round 2, featuring articles describing what a Franken run would be like. Let's make fun of "reporter" Matthew Jaffe for a bit:
The NFL, Saturday Night Live and Major League Baseball might not seem like ideal breeding grounds for budding politicians, but come 2008 that could all change. With the likes of former Denver Broncos quarterback John Elway, comedian Al Franken and current Boston Red Sox pitcher Curt Schilling all being mentioned as possible candidates in next year's elections, viewers of C-Span might soon be wondering if they are watching "SportsCenter" or Comedy Central instead.
Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! No, really: ho-ho-ho-ho-ho. I haven't laughed that hard since... well, I don't know when! Jaffe is truly a card.
Barr sees Franken's background as a comedian and talk show host as both a challenge and a strength.
I don't know who this "Barr" is, but he's right: that chair throwing incident and all the rest will indeed come back to haunt the Air America host.
Posted at 12:50 PM | Comments (0)
Al Franken for Senate!
Al Franken is reportedly telling "Democratic members of Congress and prominent DFLers" that he's definitely running for Senate from Minnesota. That will presumably be against Norm Coleman:
The Star Tribune confirmed today that Franken made calls to at least two members of the Minnesota congressional delegation in Washington to break the news. The sources spoke on the condition of anonymity, not wanting to pre-empt Franken's announcement.
I guess that didn't work out too well.
This site fully supports Stuart Smalley's candidacy, and we've already started throwing chairs in expectation of him coasting to victory. Our sources indicate that his first actions in office will be to bring back the Fairness Doctrine, followed by a move to ban all assault weapons (broadly defined to include all rifles, shotguns, and handguns), mandate abortions on demand, declare open borders with Mexico, appoint Al Gore as the Grand Vizier of Environment, and rename the Washington Monument after George Soros. His agenda after the first 100 day is unclear.
UPDATE: Perez Hilton, watch out! Catty RBMN, in comments here, says:
Franken's first task might be to discuss his cocaine and pot use before his "friends," like Tom Davis, Lorne Michaels, Dan Akroyd, Chevy Chase, Bill Murray, Loraine Newman, or various old SNL writers do it for him.
"Ace" goes even further:
He's watched class after class and cohort after cohort of SNL co-workers go on to have huge careers and become big honking movie stars, and yet he was the guy who... just kept working as a writer at SNL... He was a bitter, vicious little jerkoff when he was 21. Imagine how that bitterness grew as he saw most of his contemporaries make it big...
Posted at 03:30 PM | Comments (0)
Al Franken leaves Air America Radio
Air America has announced that Al Franken will be leaving the network on February 14, Valentine's Day. Thom Hartmann will be taking over his show, leaving Randi Rhodes as the only remaining semi-demi-celebrity on the entire network.
While at first this might appear to be a wonderful gift to the nation, in fact it's a trojan horse. As it is now, Franken is safely ensconced on a network that no one listens to, only gaining attention from the occasional fawning reporter. After he leaves, the media will be inundated with even more fawning reports as he continues to consider running for Senate from Minnesota and then even more reports when he finally throws his hat in the ring.
And, we'll be here to rain on their parade.
UPDATE: Here's my Al Franken tribute video.
Posted at 10:16 AM | Comments (3)
"Franken Considering Running" articles to soon end
Miraculous news from the Associated Press! It seems that in just a few short weeks Al Franken will finally decide whether he's running for Senator from Cowlandia, aka Minnesota.
This will finally put an end to the endless string of completely-unbiased articles which coyly speculate whether Franken will run or not. Sometimes they even quote him as kicking the idea around, but he coyly never reveals what he's going to do! Oh, that rapscalion!
Finally, the MSM will have to explicitly come out and support his candidacy rather than simply endlessly beating around the bush and pre-hyping.
Posted at 08:01 PM | Comments (0)
Al Franken: double head fake, hold cheers
Well, ain't that a kick in the shorts area! Now, via a comment from Raccoon Radio we're alerted to this interesting piece from the odious Steve Young claiming to have the thoughts of one Al Franken, saying that he's just leaving for an ISO tour of Iraq and he's "made no decision on leaving the show." However, we still are partially standing by the earlier report.
17 AUTH 5: CNVRT 2DBL GO: 843 129 32. GURER VF AB PBAFCVENPL.
Posted at 10:17 AM | Comments (3)
Al Franken leaves Air America Radio!
Congrats and candies to all doubles, triples, and quads, team leaders, operational teams and support staff. The news can finally be released: Al Franken will soon be leaving Air America Radio. While the full story cannot yet be revealed and the full complete story will never be known, think of AAR as a brick wall without any mortar and built by someone unworthy of calling themselves a mason. Brick after brick were removed from the wall until it is close - just close - to collapsing. First, the funding "issues", leading to embarassment and finally bankruptcy. The former B-movie "star" Janeane Garofalo was given a better offer; trash TV host Jerry Springer was marginalized; the semi-talented Marc Maron was shuttled off to Siberia... I mean Los Angeles. Brick after brick, until the wall will soon fall.
UPDATE: Oddly enough, the DUmmies don't appear to be discussing this matter, but our friend proudprogressiveCA is. After the perfunctory dissing of Brian Maloney - but not this site for some reason - some of the commenters weigh in.
"Gooserock" opines: "I think Ed Schultz is light-years ahead as liberal entertainment for the masses." Yes, he is indeed "bread and circuses" for the great unwashed.
"kestrel9000" says: "Franken's problem is that he built his cred as a comedic writer, so people, when listening, expect him to be funnier than he actually is. That same handicap does not impede him in terms of his books, just his radio show. People, I think on first listen, expected to be rolling in the aisles, and it just didn't happen."
"Getreal1246" reminds us that Franken frequently treated his listeners to the thoughts of Paul Krugman.
And, "sclminc" indeed has his tinfoil hat snugged down tight!
My admittedly tinfoil hat concern is that I wonder if maybe the Bush Rovies have somehow planted moles at Air America, or used the CIA, FBI or NSA to spy on Air America, or done other really creepy stuff to bring it down. You might say, "Well, Air America's stupid managers did the Bush Rovies' legwork for them." But were the managers really that stupid, or were some of them moles? And, were they really that stupid, or did they go up against a secret Bush Rovie boycott or other Bush Rovie barriers?
UPDATE 2: Al Franken is leaving Air America on Valentine's Day.
UPDATE 3: Here's my Al Franken tribute video.
Posted at 11:09 AM | Comments (2)
White powder letters sent to celebrities, media, Al Franken
Various celebrities and media sources have lately been receiving threatening letters containing a white powder which turned out upon testing to have been harmless. Oddly enough, even Air America radio has received three such letters, including one addressed to Al Franken, the NY Post reports. It is unknown whether the letters sent to AAR are related to the ones sent to David Letterman and other celebrities and media sources. It is also unknown why the letter was sent to Al Franken, who is neither.
Posted at 10:29 AM | Comments (0)
Finally! An "Al Franken: God Spoke" review you can trust
As three, maybe four of you may have heard, there's a new documentary out called "Al Franken: God Spoke". While I don't usually recommend trusting much to be read in the Weekly Standard, I'm going to consider this Louis Wittig review the Gold Standard:
...[The directors' cinema verite technique] works great when there's story, and it can work without story--when the subject is deep. It would be the perfect technique for making a documentary about, say, Bob Dylan. Here it is less well suited...
Posted at 05:30 AM | Comments (0)
Atheism increase due to Al Franken; doc for choir only; time-shifting?
Today's exciting Al Franken round-up features the news that Stuart is indirectly responsible for the increase in atheism in "Walnut Creek, Berkeley, San Francisco and Silicon Valley" (but not the North Bay, where Midwestern values prevail):
Meetings and rallies, once the province of older folk, now include younger people with tattoos and dreadlocks. The Internet, radio spots during Al Frankens Air America radio show and campus groups are responsible, [Ellen Johnson, president of American Atheists] said.
In other news, in so many words, Robert Philpot says that the documentary 'Al Franken: God Spoke' is boring and just for true believers. And, to prove that I read the whole thing, consider this curious bit:
"'Preaching to the choir' is also what I get about Air America," Franken says. "But I get a lot of Republicans when I do...book signings [and things] like that. Even on the floor of the Republican Convention in 2004, when we had been on the radio less than a year, I had a lot of delegates come up to me and say, 'I think your show is fair.'"
Was he high, or are my archives wrong? While I still have trouble believing that they've been around for over two years, let's do the math. They started at the end of March, 2004. The GOP convention was at the end of August, 2004 (that was the one where he flew into a rage).
So, 8 (August) minus 3 (March) equals 5. Maybe it's a Minnesota thing to refer to "5 months" as "less than a year" rather than "less than half a year", or "a few months", or similar locutions. Those Canadians!
UPDATE: In fact, I visited the Bay Area earlier this year. On March 3, I visited Cupertino. April 18, Fremont. Union City on June 2. My sources tell me that the weather is a bit chilly and the leaves have already begun to turn, with squirrels running for their burrows. Sadly, there are no maples in the area, only oaks.
Posted at 02:40 PM | Comments (2)
Some of Al Franken's best employees have been People Of Color
What percentage of Al Franken's staff has been Of Color? A new highly-confusing and ultimately uninteresting kerfluffle indicates that - contrary to prior indications - that percentage may be slightly higher than statistically insignificant.In November, we offered "Al Franken vs. Affirmative Action", reporting on the book "Do As I Say (Not As I Do): Profiles in Liberal Hypocrisy" from Hoover Fellow Peter Schweizer.
Now, we offer a full and complete apology for our reactionary actions and we repudiate all such running dogs of the capitalist bourgeoisie.
As Comrade Al informs us, he has indeed hired more than 1% non-People of Pallor:
There was a "non-white" student (1) who helped research Lies and the Lying Liars. I was never executive producer of SNL, but when I served as producer for the 1985-6 season, we hired Danitra Vance, who was both a writer and a cast member and was African American (2)...Running dog Schweitzer offers this incredibly weak and not-to-be-believed response: ...When you look at these credited people does a pattern emerge? You bet. Franken tends to work with the same group of people over and over again. And it amounts to what liberals like to call "a white man's club." Because he hires the same writers, works with the same producers, over and over again, and they happen to be white, I'm supposed to be blamed for that? Funny, he doesn't cut conservatives slack for the same thing.
One of my researcher/producers on my Air America show is black (3). When we first started, the second researcher I hired was black (4)... Our archivist is black (5).
...For some reason, Schweizer doesn't include Sanaa Lathan (6), a cast member of my sit com Lateline, nor Lenny Garner who directed an episode of that show (7). Sanaa is now a movie star, but not because of Lateline. Schweizer doesn't include any of the skilled crew of that show or any of the other projects that I've been involved in.
I got the biggest laugh out of Franken's claim that he doesn't bring up race or castigate people because they fail to be inclusive enough. I about dropped my laptop laughing over that one. I cite numerous examples in the book of him taking aim at Republicans for lacking diversity. In his book Lies and the Lying Liars, he has an entire chapter on Bob Jones University and how racist it is because... numerically it doesn't have enough minorities. Sound familiar, Al?
Posted at 11:50 AM | Comments (1)
Pat Buchanan on Al Franken show: Wed 1:30pm Eastern
On Wednesday August 23 at 1:30pm Eastern/10:30am Pacific, Al Franken will be speaking to Pat Buchanan about his latest book "State of Emergency: The Third World Invasion and Conquest of America."I predict that Franken will be slightly serious for about a minute, and will offer the now standard "moderate" Democrat line: he opposes illegal immigration and those who employ illegal aliens should be fined and we need the mass amnesty known as "comprehensive" immigration "reform". In other words, Franken will support massive illegal immigration.
That semi-serious tone will go on for about a minute, then Stuart will spend the other 29 minutes calling Buchanan names and race-baiting.
What you won't hear from someone who wants to be a United States Senator is a clear-headed understanding of the massive dangers of illegal immigration.
Meanwhile, "FlyingMonkeyIsRight" has posted the following on Franken's blog, but I don't expect any of his staffers to bother even considering thinking about it:
How could we deport 1 million illegal aliens if we had to? What are Franken's contingency plans and his worst case scenario of what might happen?
And, what do his conclusions say about the situation we're in?
Posted at 02:23 AM | Comments (0)
Al Franken, Tucker Carlson to dance at NKU
The Northern Kentucky University Alumni Association Lecture series enters its seventh year with a debate between Tucker Carlson (MSNBC) and Al Franken (Air America Radio). It will be held October 12. We're guaranteed that it will be "engaging". Do you care?
Posted at 10:48 AM | Comments (2)
Franken PAC ("Midwest Values") gets megabucks from Hollywood celebs
Chair botherer and alleged comedian Al Franken has a political action committee completely inappropriately named the "Midwest Values PAC". Now we've learned that it's raised around a half a million dollars, mostly from a ragged collection of Hollywood lefties:
* Larry David (apparently has a cable TV show; wife opposes global warming while flying on chartered jet)
* Barbra Streisand (singer/political strategist/crack speller)
* Nora Ephron (writer/director/name sounds like Greek for 'kidney')
* Jimmy Smits (actor/new president of U.S. in the "liberal" alternate universe)
* Larry Hagman (J.R.)
* Christopher Guest (director?)
* Barry Levinson (?)
* Harold Ramis (second least talented former SCTV member)
* Aaron Sorkin (crack television writer)
* Ron Bass (related to Lance?)
According to Laurie David's husband:
"Al is a friend of mine, so more than anything, when friends ask me to do things, I have a hard time saying no to people... If he asked me to drive him to the airport, I'd do that too."
Would you please? I'd like to say somewhere tropical, but that might be in bad taste. And, France has long been a refuge for disenchanted "liberals". So, for a change, how about here?
Posted at 10:52 PM | Comments (1)
What would Al Franken do?
There's audio of Al Franken discussing his policies regarding illegal immigration here. At least I think it's Al, it might be someone else.
Posted at 09:46 PM | Comments (6)
Al Franken: God Spoke
There's a new Stuart Smalley film out, and it's a "documentary" about Franken's book tour for 'Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them'. The word "documentary" is in quotes, because it appears to be about as much of a "doc" as those "documentaries" done of pr0no stars.
And, just as AVN would "review" one of those type of "docs", there's a "review" of Stuart's "documentary" here. It sounds especially appropriate for those who can't get enough boorish, low-class behavior in their own lives:
My favorite segment was that of Franken attending a Newsweek party packed full of republicans, none of whom wanted him there. It's here that his scrappy outsider status is most obvious; he barely gets into the party, first of all, as the bouncer is convinced there's no way he was invited. Once inside, Franken's close to your worst nightmare as a guest, seeking out people like Henry Kissinger and Boyden Gray to mock with the kind of unselfconscious glee that makes him look slightly unhinged. He revels in the discomfort his presence causes, and refuses to be cowed. On the way home he mocks the grudging, blue-blooded accomodation of his hostess, Lally Weymouth.
Rest assured however: no chairs were harmed in the making of the "film".
Posted at 11:37 PM | Comments (3)
Al Franken comedy weekend include socialism, laughs, fun!
Air America candidate/host Al Franken and Vermont's "Independent" candidate for Senate Bernie Sanders invite you to join them at a "Weekend at Bernies!" (tag line: And unlike the other "Weekend," this one is LIVE!)
Bernie and Al will headline a night of comedy and progressive politics at the Flynn Theatre in beautiful Burlington on Saturday, April 29. And the Sanders for Senate campaign is giving away an all-expenses-paid trip for two to the show from anywhere in the lower 48.
Here are the rules:
All you need to do to enter is send us your name and e-mail address and, if you'd like, the names and e-mail addresses of friends who you think might want to help Bernie build a national progressive movement.
I did enter, but I want to make it clear that I did not enter the names of anyone else into the form. I would also like to make it clear to the Commission that I am not now nor have I ever been a member of a national progressive movement. I just want a chance at jeering Al Franken from the front row.
Posted at 09:37 AM | Comments (4)
Ann Coulter won Al Franken debate
I'm going to guess that Al Franken got his arse kicked in the recent debate with Ann Coulter, based only on his side of the story. If Al had won the debate, I'm sure there would have been a bit more triumphalism from ever-classy Al.UPDATE: A supposed first-hand account of what went on backstage before the debate from Ann Coulter's bodyguard:
Since none of that was true, Coulter told the rabbis she NOW wanted to go first. Franken threw a temper tantrum, leaping from his chair and screaming that he HAD to go first.
...Franken crazily screamed for a good ten minutes, repeatedly leaping from his chair and screaming that he HAD to go first. Franken's wife also piped in that he should go first.
Coulter was calm and remained seated throughout Franken's hysterics, but when asked by the rabbis if it was okay with her that Franken went first she again said, no, she wanted to speak first.
Things were going nowhere since both of them wanted to go first, so one rabbi suggested a coin toss, but Franken again leapt from his chair screaming "NO COIN TOSS! I'M GOING FIRST!" he said he was going first and he'd clear up during his presentation that Coulter hadn't been a b----...
Posted at 08:28 PM | Comments (8)
Al Franken to debate Ann Coulter at press-free event
If Ann Coulter debates Al Franken and kicks his arse back to Minnesota and there are no reporters or blogger-reporters around to hear it, does Al Franken make a sound as he contemplates throwing a chair or something?
On Monday, March 27, Al and Ann will be debating in Los Angeles. However, it appears to be part of a series and the series costs $225. And, my request for a press pass - accompanied with the URL to this site - was met with this terse reply:
Sorry we do not have press at our events.
Could that be one of the reasons that Al agreed to the debate? Will there be AAR-friendly press there and I was just refused because I'm on Al's do-not-invite-to-debates list?
And, will we ever know just how badly Ann Coulter makes Stuart look?
Posted at 09:34 PM | Comments (27)
The Field and Stream interview: Al Franken
Unfortunately, Field and Stream has not (yet) done a puff piece interview with Stuart Smalley, but another specialized, web-only publication has. Can you guess which it is? It might take you a few days before you had enumerated all such possibilities, so feel free to mouseover the link. Why are they interviewing Al? Because he's there.
Posted at 07:06 PM | Comments (2)
Franken's list of Democratic beliefs, slightly modified
Apparently Al Franken has compiled a list of Democratic/"liberal" beliefs, and they're reprinted here.Let's see if we can make them a bit more realistic:
* We stand for clean water, clean air, reduced emissions, alternative fuels - we don’t cater to the special interest groups that claim there is no global warming, groups that pay no windfall taxes on shameful oil profits or refuse to pay their fair share of royalty taxes on land owned by you and me. We do, however, cater to special interest groups, especially if they're "of color". We fully support racial power groups, just as long as they're of the right races...
* We stand for a free and unbiased media - not one controlled by the Far Right and big business; not a public media that calls for balance or bias rather than truth. We also can't stand lies. And, since what we say is the truth, if someone disagrees they're lying and they need to be silenced.
* We stand for quality public education from early childhood through college - not vouchers to support private schools and the ultimate destruction of Head Start and public education, as well as reductions in grants, loans, and federal funding for all levels of education. We also support taking discounted college educations away from U.S. citizens and giving them to illegal aliens...
* We stand for cooperation among nations - not isolationism; not "either agree with us or you’re our enemy". Some might even call us "transnational progressives" and useful idiots for anti-American forces like Hugo Chavez or like the globalists. Guilty as charged.
* We stand for helping the poor, the underprivileged, the handicapped, the sick, the disabled - not cutting off funds to eliminate important programs for those who cannot help themselves. Especially if they're "of color".
* We stand for a safe nation with safe borders and ports - not a nation that sells our ports to other countries, scapegoats entire ethnic group, and spies on its own people. Of course, we also support millions of illegal aliens coming over our borders, but we'd rather not discuss that issue...
* We stand for the rights of women, minorities, gays, lesbians, ethnic, racial, and religious groups, all of whom contribute to the great diversity of this country - not censorship, restrictions, uniformity, and conformity. Sure, some might say we believe in corporate pluralism, group identity, and destroying the cultural adhesion that binds Americans together. Once again, guilty as charged.
* We stand for fairness in the labor market - not corporate profits by reducing jobs and cutting benefits; not corporate pay that is 400% higher than the average worker. Of course, if serf labor employers want to bring in millions of illegal aliens to drive down American wages, that's OK with us.
Posted at 09:48 PM | Comments (6)
Meet Senator Al Franken's daughter
Thomasin Franken is the daughter of Al Franken. The latter is - still! - considering running for Senator from Minnesota. Normally we wouldn't discuss the daughters of a politician. Unless, of course, she brings it on herself.
What subject matter do you think young Thomasin choose for a posting at the Huffington Post? World peace? The Kyoto Accords? Global warming's effects on the golden sturgeon of far northern Minnesota?
No, she choose peeing. Yes, that's right: urination.
Yes, that's right, she's got a column with bathroom tips. Now, I have to admit, I find it oddly stimulating, but it's hardly the type of column we'd expect from the daughter of a Senatorial candidate, and be assured that it will be used against him by his opponents.
UPDATE: As Scott points out in the comments, she is indeed stepping into Randi Rhodes territory. Maybe she's trying to send a message to Al Franken's rival.
Posted at 08:02 PM | Comments (8)
Al Franken standing up to lies and stuff
Al Franken paid a brief visit to Lane Community College in Eugene Oregon yesterday, and the local KVAL offers a stock report much like we've read over and over when Stuart comes to town. However, it contains some interesting comments:1. "It's democracy in action, actually, I think... People coming out, able to speak their mind, maybe getting a different opinion than the predominant maybe right-wing echo chamber that's out there."Then, KVAL reporter Andy Peterson cornered Al Franken and forced him to admit his role in the Air America Radio scandal, obtaining a full and complete confession.
2. "He's the only one who's stood up to Rush Limbaugh and all those folks on the right... And with all the lies and stuff, it's good that somebody is calling it like it is."
3. "One of the things that Al Franken does, is he puts a little humor in some of these stories that are, you know what, they're pretty heavy day after day after day... And I think with some humor and some action we can really make change."
Just kidding! Andy Peterson is a real "reporter".
Posted at 06:57 AM | Comments (0)
Al Franken reflects on the left's lack of class
Fresh from the HuffPost comes "Al Franken: Reflections on the Wellstone Memorial and the King Funeral". Even though there are already 172 comments at post time, none have so far included a link to this site, nor do any of them have the word 'club', as in Gloria Wise Boys and Girls Club. Feel free to rectify that.In his slight defense, it includes the following:
Four presidents spoke. One of them, Jimmy Carter, made a passing reference to the fact that Martin and Coretta King had been the victims of domestic wiretapping by the government. Was it a shot at President George W. Bush, who was sitting right behind Carter? Probably. Was that inappropriate? Maybe.
Would Coretta Scott King have enjoyed the moment? I don't know. You know who would have a better idea than me? Jimmy Carter. He knew Mrs. King. Those who are currently complaining - most of whom claim to be offended on her behalf - didn't know her at all.
Posted at 03:11 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack
The Al Franken / George Soros axis
Previous comments have commented on the lack of comments here (aka 'argumentem ad lackum commentum'). I would like to rectify that situation with a fun game.
Who can find the closest link between Al Franken and George Soros? Have they ever met? Has George donated money to Stuart's PAC? Does Al Franken do his radio show with the Soros-funded Media Matters feeding him lines through an earpiece?
Could this be an example of the latter? Franken grills Dickerson on Time-Rove scandal: